Grief.

In my pursuit to better understand God's character, I am realizing more and more about myself as well.

Specifically, I'm learning about how I react when I am plagued with seasons of grief.

I find that I pull away from others and return to myself in those times.  And I easily let emotions take over and affect my reasoning.

And as much as those can fog my vision of who God is,

the core of it all - the core of me - is belief in an almighty and all powerful God.  

Christ would also pull away from others.

But He pulled Himself away from the world to be alone with His Father.

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[And they went to a place called Gethsemane. And he said to his disciples, "Sit here while I pray." And he took with him Peter and James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them, "My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch." And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, "Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will." -Mark 14: 32-36]

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Jesus, the Savior of this world, was greatly distressed and troubled.  He was sorrowful.

But He beautifully cried out to His Father.

He prayed for the possibility of an alternative BUT still remained that He would seek the will of His Father.

With all the darkness of this world cast upon the most beautiful person to ever exist, His eyes still gazed upwards and He could clearly see.

His response in His sorrow is my model.

Jesus, teach me.

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If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear Your voice | I’ll hold on to what is true though I cannot see | If the storms of life they come and the road ahead gets steep | I will lift these hands in faith | I will believe | I remind myself of all that You've done | And the life I have because Your Son | Love came down and rescued me | Love came down and set me free | I am Yours, I am forever Yours | Mountain high or valley low | I sing out remind my soul | That I am Yours, I am forever Yours | When my heart is filled with hope | And every promise comes my way | When I feel Your hands of grace rest upon me | Staying desperate for You God | Staying humbled at Your feet | I will lift these hands and praise | I will believe | I remind myself of all that You've done | And the life I have because of Your Son | Love came down and rescued me | Love came down and set me free | I am Yours, I am forever Yours | Mountain high or valley low | I sing out remind my soul | That I am Yours, I am forever Yours